Sorry About The. Scilence

Sorry it's been well over a week since my last post!  I did have every intention of writing something up last Wednesday but things just got in the way!

Wednesday started out great!  I stepped on the scale and I was down 1 pound, see I even did a happy little selfie!  I'm now down 1.2 lbs. 

After work I went to the gym and met up with a friend for a pre-vacation pedicure!   A little tradition I started last summer that before every trip I get a pedi. Not a big fancy-girlie nail person. But it's fun to have pretty nails!  I picked out this cool shade of blue and she even gave me a cute little flowr on my big toes. 

That's when the week started to go downhill. While at the nail salon I felt like a headache was coming on. I popped two Excedrin for migraine. Hoping it was just the fumes that were bothering me. That and the fact I was starving. I then hooked up with another friend for dinner, figured I needed to eat sooner rather than later... That sometimes is the probelm. A decent dinner with nice company, and I felt a little better. While waiting for our food I was checking out a Just Cross Stitch issue Chrostin had picked up for me... Left that at the restaurant. Went back it was nowhere to be found. 

Another sign that things weren't going well after dinner we stopped in at the mall across the street. I wanted to hit the Body Shop for my favourite facial cleanser. While walking around I noticed I was starting to itch. Yup, I was breaking out in hives. So I followed that earlier Excedrin with a chaser of Claratin. 

Thursday morning I couldn't get out of bed.  Well I tried, I got up and showered, called in sick and went back to bed until 11am. Then I went back to bed again in the afternoon for 3 more hours. This migraine had hit me hard. I felt better on Friday and made it into work despite feeling like I got ran over. I didn't feel great most of the weekend and stuck close to home. 

When I feel like this I tend to not eat well when I do eat and my cravings tend to rule me. So I didn't makes part choices, I didn't track. I am proud that I did track after the fact. 

I peeked at the scale this morning because tomorrow I'm up at stupid dark o'clock getting to the airport for 5am, on a plane for 7am for the first half of my journey to Charleston SC. Originally my flight was supposed to be two and a half hours later. Now because of this change I get to entertain myself at the Detroit Airport for over 5 hours!  Oh joy! 

Anyhow back to that peek, I'm up 0.2lbs. Though being fairly active a couple of days of feeling like shit (or death warmed over) and tracking after the fact I guess that's okay. I'm still not happy with it. I may pop on the scale tomorrow morning, but I have a massage after work today and I really don't plan on cooking tonight so we may eat out, both I find affect the scale. 

My plan for this trip is to get out and walk each morning (workout clothes are packed), enjoy the things (food) I can't get up here. I see at least one Sonic a Peanut Butter Fudge milkshake in my future. If we get into a Cracker Barrel one or two biscuits with gravy. I'm sure there may be other sinful delights, and if I'm going to be bad I want it to be a) something I can't get at home b) worth every bite!  I am going to track what I eat, or at least journal it and not worry about the points. 

If I can I'd like to break even after this trip. 

Little Things...

Its the second week for the Little Things Linkup and I'm sitting here trying to rack my brains for that little thing that's made me smile or feel good about myself.

1. The lovely gentleman at the Tim Hortons drive thru that let me go ahead of him this morning.  There's two entries to the gas station where I hit the "On The Run" Timmies for my morning tea.  He had come in where the lineup tends to be when there is one, I had come in from the other side.  So I was ready to wait my turn.  He waved me in!  Thank you so much for that kind gesture this morning!

2. My weigh-in this morning was not what I was picturing it to be.  I had visions of getting out of the 190's, I had a start weight of 190.4 lbs.  I stepped on the scale this morning to see 190.2 staring back at me.  What a let down!  I know why my number didn't give me that happy-weigh-in-buzz.  I got empty leg syndrome on Monday night and started eating like food was going out of style and that kinda continued yesterday as well!  At times I was physically hungry, at times I ate just because it was there.  So instead of giving up, I'm turning that negative into a positive and I'm going to try harder and eat ONLY when I'm hungry.  Also on the positive side I tracked everything last week!  I'll continue this week.

Okay now while I've already touched on the subject of Timmies... I'm really good almost all the time when I hit Tims (if you don't know about Tim Hortons its a Canadian institution, a coffee/doughnut shop).  Its always for a cup of tea in the morning, its also a great place to stop when road tripping for either a sandwich, soup or bagel and you can find them in almost everywhere in Canada.  They are also at every stop along the 401.  That's if you can stay away from the sweet treats.

Look at what was staring me in the face when I got up to the drive-thru!!!  OMG my mouth started just watering looking at the latest additions to their menu!  I LOVE Oreos, I don't buy them for a reason and if they are Golden Oreos I'm likely to knock you over to get at the bag and eat a whole row!  Now the doughnut didn't tempt me as much as that Oreo Iced Cappuccino!  Oh my!  In the summer I find there is noting more tempting than an iced coffee-drink-thing or soft serve.  To throw Oreo cookies into the mix.

I haven't given in to temptation ... yet but I might find myself allotting the points to have one in the near future, just to try it.

Busy Weekends Are Good

This weekend was a busy, exhausting one!  The one good thing about busy weekends is there's no time to be bored and no chance to graze!  That's a reason to love a busy weekend!  Of course now I'm so tired I'm not even interested in eating LOL!

My partner Todd is an avid angler, a bass man.  For the last couple of years he's been in one of the Eastern Ontario tournament circuits with my friend Tracey's husband.  We're so lucky that the four of us are such great friends and we can just hang out.  This spring he got the boat of is (almost) dreams.  The boat he really wanted wouldn't fit in our garage!

Yesterday no one was available to go fishing with him.  So I agreed to head out on the water and try my best.

It was not a good day on the water, fishing-wise.  Todd seemed to be the only one catching what few fish we did catch.

Since things were slow, I had a nice nap, and even pulled out a little stitching on the boat!

Though the fishing sucked, and I was skunked I still had a great day out on the water!

Today, while the boys were out on the water for one of their tournaments, Tracey and I spent the day together.  We puttered around town, and had a nice lunch out.  It was nice to spend the day together before she and Ed head East for the summer!  Again I was too busy to worry about snacking and grazing!

I've managed to track my food all week so far, and I'll find out on Wednesday if going back to the old Weight Watchers points system has helped.

I Broke Up With Weight Watchers Today

Yes, I did I broke up with Weight Watchers today... well kinda.

During the last month of silence I've been doing a lot of thinking about myself and where do I want to go and now do I want to get there. The last couple of years have been a weight loss disaster. Things started going downhill for me when Points Plus was introduced. From the moment the switch was made it became harder for me to maintain my 63lb weight loss. I'm sure it's just not the plan, it's in my head too.





So as of today I'm sitting at 190.4 lbs (gym selfie from yesterday above) which means I've gained back about 47 of those pounds. Depressing isn't it? Just makes me want to go on a binge and never stop, thinking about it. Yesterday was my reset, my fresh start. I'm going to try to forget how far I got, and how far I've fallen. Just focus on today and where I want to go from here.

I mentioned I broke up with Weight Watchers.... Kinda. Today I did cancel my monthly pass, no more meetings, no more etools, no more points plus. Each week sitting in my meetings knowing I had another gain made me feel like a fake/hypocrite. It was doing bad things for my headspace/psyche/motivation. I've decided to go it alone, old school!




I knew I kept all my old WW stuff for a reason! I lost all my weight on this plan so of I can't do to this time, I KNOW the problem is ME. So I've pulled out the old slider, points book and I picked up one of the tracking journals. I'm hoping writing it down will make me much more accountable.

I'm also getting back into the gym. This is another thing that's been messing with my head. I've been dealing with foot pain since March and what activities I can do are limited. Many of the classes have too much impact or the times just don't work with my schedule. So the plan is to get on, get on the bike and do the quick fit weight circuit.

So that's the plan, I'm getting tired of outgrowing my clothes and having to buy new, bigger clothing.




I saw this on Facebook this morning, and just seemed very appropriate!

- thanks for reading!

I'm Done Sulking Now....

I've been having a weight loss failure sulk and its time to suck things up and get back to "real life".  I'll blog more about this later.  For now I saw this linkup and I think its perfect!  Its encouraging us to talk about the little things that make your day better.  Its so easy to focus on the negative (like I have been doing)!

Today I started fresh, new mindset, new focus.  I can do this!  Also its summertime and I'm a 12 month employee in a school.  I was happy today to come into work in yoga capris, and t-shirt!  I've also plugged my music into the Learning Commons sound system and I've cranked up the tunes!

Monday's Positive Reflection

This past weekend was so-so and I don't really feel too positive about my choices. 

On Friday night I picked up the black pair of Keds from Costco. They looked much better on my feet at work today with my dress pants instead of my big, clunky running shoes that look oh so sexy with work clothes. Yeah I go for the professional working in New York walking around the city... All the time. They also seem to make my feet happier. 

Today was a fresh start!  I've done really well with my food plan and tracking for today.  Everything that went into this girl's belly was healthy, smart choices and within my points budget. I also know that I'm much more successful at weight loss when I plan and make dinner. If I leave dinner to chance I often don't really make anything and I overeat my budget. Above is tonight's dinner a beef stir-fry with white rice. I know I should eat brown rice but I REALLY don't like it, it's a texture thing!  Is there a food that has a texture you don't like?

Another thing I'm proud of is I made it to the gym after work!  I had to make one stop first and often I'll use something like that as an excuse just to keep on heading home. I didn't, I continued into the gym!  Yay me! And for the first time in like a bajillion years my workout felt great and I left the gym feeling that way!!!  Over the past months there's been many a time I've wanted to quit and walk away from my workout. 

I think what has been making me so miserable, a weight loss failure, and living in a personal pity party has been my FEET!!!!  Last week I finally broke down to see my doctor (she rocks!) asked for a referral to the best person to help diagnose the pain in my feet and come up with a treatment plan. I also asked her for a prescription for naproxen to mange the pain (and I have a good tolerance for pain so it takes a lot for me to ask for painkillers). Since being on the pain killers it's almost been a complete 180!  I'm not pain free, but I'm not in constant pain and hobbling at the end do the day. Having your pain managed certainly makes the day seem much more brighter!

Friday's Positive Reflection

Over the last couple of Weight Watchers meetings, my awesome leader has been encouraging us to take stock at the end of each day, and to refect POSITIVELY on how or day was. Want positive things we've done to make us successful on our weight loss journeys. 

I've been meaning to do this, most of May... honestly I have and I just keep forgetting. I need a lot of positive right now as you know I'm feeling quite down on myself lately.  

Today I had my head spin the right place and I made all the right food choices. I was running really behind this morning and I almost said screw it, that I would buy breakfast and lunch. I gave my head a shake and quickly threw cut up veggies (prepping paid off here!), yogurt, cheese string, hummus, and crackers in my lunch bag and for snacks watermelon that I also had cut up already and an apple. So in the end I only just grabbed breakfast on my way in since I was already stopping at Timmies for a tea. I grabbed a bagel toasted with butter which is a treat, I love a good bagel and this one was maple cinnamon French toast, oh yummy!  The point price at 9 PP was a little steeper than what I usually have for breakfast but I did enjoy it and counted it. 

I am also proud that I avoided the ice cream temptation at Costco, on a beautiful warm day.  There's something about a warm, sunny day that just makes me crave vanilla soft serve!  Especially as you're walking in and all you see is every other person walking out, enjoying their Costco ice cream!

I did make a great buy at Cosrco this Keds for $23.99 I've been wanting RED shoes!  I might have also picked up a pair in black....