Making A Loosing List

This blog entry is long overdue, and I promised it to you in my last post! At first I wanted to sit down and think about it before posting it here.

We were challenged at last weeks Weight Watchers meeting to make a loosing list. This is your list of reason(s) to loose weight and reach your goal. This topic really left me thinking instead of participating in the meeting (I'm one of those people at the meeting who always has something to say/share).

Why do I want to loose weight?

There are the obvious reasons:

-fit in my size 8 pants again (currently back up to a size 12)
-fit my winter jackets again... I need to go buy a new, bigger one because I've put on enough weight since last winter that they don't fit properly over my hips
-feel sexy again
-be able to run a 1/2 marathon (again)
-to feel and look good
-to feel strong

The personal reason:

When I first lost my weight 63 lbs my Mum was my biggest supporter. I lost her suddenly in June. She never said it, but it know how proud of me she was. That I was more acceptable weight and healthy. So I'm doing this for my Mum, I miss her.



- thanks for reading!

The Negotiator

I will spend all day talking myself in and out of the exercise I'm planning on doing after work most days. I negotiate with myself.

You're exhausted ... Go home and sleep.

You've been so busy! ... Go home and relax.

Not feeling to good... Go home and sleep/veg.

Feel like a migraine is coming on, better get home just incase it gets too bad to drive.

You're almost finished that cross stitch project... Go home and stitch!

I could just go on and on! I'll also often tell myself I can get on the treadmill later that night. Sometimes I do many times I don't. I don't know about you, but once I'm relaxed for the night I don't like to get up and get going again.



So after negotiating with myself ALL DAY today, as exhausted as I went here I am, pouty face and all about to go into the gym! Yay me!


- thanks for reading!

Recommitting

Hey there, it's been quite awhile but I think it's time for me to come back. I think documenting this journey will help, so will your support.

Since September I've been working toward recommitting myself to weight loss, Weight Watchers and being active. It's been a slow journey, I've managed to loose 4lbs in 2 and a half months. Not Biggest Looser numbers, but I try to remind myself that it's movement in the right direction.

Why has it been a slow journey this time? I've been of the mindset not to be as strict with myself this time around. Also I'm letting life get in the way too much, when I'm getting off track it's not for an hour or a moment, I'll let it go on for a few days or a week. I need to remind myself that I don't want to give up what I've worked so hard to achieve.

I've just had a week of not counting/eating what I want (or exercising). Though I've enjoyed having treats without the guilt or worry, I'll be seeing those results at the scale tomorrow when I go to my WW meeting. I'm ready to re-recommit myself, to become a little more strict with myself, like I was when I first lost 63 lbs. I have since put back on 30 lbs. I know stopping here, drawing that line in the sand is a victory in itself... But I also promised myself, I'd never go back to the way I was. Here I am half way there.

What am I doing to make this re-recommit happen? I've started tracking using my WW app again, tomorrow morning, I'm going to start tracking everything, honestly. After a week of chaos last week (no time, with so much on my plate), I started exercising again today. I can't let one week beyond my control ruin two and a half months of work. Just a bump in the road.



So here I am, today somewhere in the mid 170's just before my workout.






My old running shoes recently died on me.



I've treated myself to a new pair of running shoes, for years now I've worn the Brooks Dyad, these are the latest model, the Dyad 7. I like that they've moved away from a white runner.

In mid-October I started running again, but doing my own thing outdoors on my favourite trail or in my Village. The colder weather (we've had some snow on the ground) has finally sent me indoors. I've been inspired to start the C25K Program (couch to 5km) to keep me motivated to run on the treadmill to give me a program to focus on, that will keep me going for the next 8 weeks (which should do me into January).






So here' today's program and my Nike+ stats! I am not a fast runner and I don't pretend to be.

It's a start.



- thanks for reading!

Doing Well!

I think I'm finally in the right "mental space" to do this weight loss thing.  I shouldn't call it a "thing" should I because this is VERY serious and I am taking it seriously, finally!

I saw this little gem on Facebook back at the beginning of the year and saved it, I knew it was going to come in handy, I knew that this was it... the year to shed the pounds I've gained in the last two years!

Not only am I going to kick 2013's ASS I'm going to kick this weight to the curb finally!

Like I said things are going well!  I'm still maintaining my positive metal attitude that I had back when I initially lost my weight (something that was missing the last two years).  What has the result been of this positive attitude?  While I was in the DR I managed to come home 1.8 lbs lighter!  Then the following week I didn't bounce back, but lost another 0.6 (last week).  So that's a total of 2.4 lbs gone!  Yay me!

I'm hoping for positive results again this week!  I've done really well so far this week in terms food choices, even while out and about with friends!  I'm on March Break and socializing means food and lunches out.  I have also earned Activity Points 8 days in a row!!!!!  Fingers crossed that this hard work is going to pay off this week, and if it doesn't I'm okay with that because I know sometimes things take a little longer to show up on the scale.

Yesterday saw my first road run of 2013!!  The weather has warmed up (we had a huge snow storm almost two weeks ago now), and the roads are clear enough in my area I'm not going to kill myself.  I stopped running back in the summer because of foot pain which has finally been diagnosed with Sinus Tarsus Syndrome.  So in the last month or so I've decided its time to start running again... I am having to start from square one!  Running on the treadmill has been okay, I can't run non-stop or as fast as I used to but I was doing well on the treadmill.  I forgot how road running is a completely different affair, it was almost hard to do my 5:5 intervals (5 min. run:5 min walk).  But I toughed it out and felt great for doing it!!!!

Keep working hard!!!

Starting Over

I won't share with you pictures of me in my skinny jeans this week because really there is no difference in my weight from last week's to this.

On Saturday when I went to my weekly Weight Watchers meeting (see yesterday's post for this past week's meeting topic), for the second week in a row!  Yay me!  Last week I just went, I sat through the meeting and had a bit of a chat with my meeting leader.  We agreed that this Saturday I would come to the meeting and buy 8 weeks worth of coupons.  So instead of weighing in once a month and not necessarily being committed to going weekly, for the next two months I'll be going in once a week, weighing in and staying for the meeting.  Like I used to do for years!


When I went to the scale my leader pulled out a new weight tracker for me (mine was full anyhow) and she wrote "New Start" right next to my weight.  So we treated today as my first day so my (new) starting weight is 156 lbs, which as you can see my home scale agreed.  I have 11 pounds to loose to get to goal.


I've decided I want to treat this like the new start my leader calls it, and she's right.  For months now I've been really not trying that hard.  So I'm doing this right, going to meetings, I'm taking progress pictures, and I've taken my measurements.  All things I wish I had done when I first started Weight Watchers.

So here I am in my weigh-in clothes at 156 lbs.  Many of you may think boy she still looks great, I wish I was 156 lbs and so on.  On my short 5ft 2in frame 156 lbs is overweight, and I can see where those 11 lbs are sitting on my body.  I can feel that extra weight, see where its sitting, its affecting how I feel about myself.  There are days I feel like a failure because I can't get my head around taking off this extra weight and the fact that I've been up since April and not "done" anything about it.

Here are my starting measurements :

Hips - 43 in
Bust - 37 1/2 in
Arms  - 12 in
Waist - 34 in
Thighs - 26 in

The one thing I did learn from this is that my waist is up 4 inches from March when I had to send in my waist measurement for my kilt for the Perth Kilt Run back in July.

This upcoming week I will continue to focus  on getting back into routine in terms of going to the gym and Taekwon-Do.  I will also focus on eating a proper dinner before 7:30 PM.

One of Life's Proud Moments

Despite all that's going on I am still finding moments for life and commitments I have made and following through with them.  This past Sunday was an event I had committed to back in the spring by registering for the Army Run 1/2 Marathon!  I had every excuse in the book to drop out, to sell my race bib this year.

I used the heat as an excuse not to get out and run often and far enough (wasn't it stinkin' hot this year?).  Then almost 3 weeks prior to Race Day life was turned upside down with Mum's hospitalization.  I didn't let any of those excuses hold me back or stop me ... I spent the week leading up to race day freaking out, worried about how prepared I wasn't and so on.  As Nike says: "Just Do It" and that's what I intended to do.  My goal was just to cross the finish line, I didn't care how I did it, or how long it would take!

 This is what Freakin' Dark O'Clock looks like

I woke up Sunday morning at Freakin' Dark O'Clock!  Not my favourite time of the day.  With my bag packed the night before, and running clothes set out, I made a fantastic protein smoothie for breakfast and set out for what I was considering to be the craziest day of my life!

 Can't you tell I LOVE mornings?

Witness our nervous smiles?

I met up with my friends Amy and Marline.  Amy was supposed to walk the 1/2 marathon (21.1 K) but she sadly declared when I saw her at the end of August that she was "broken again" but that she would be my "Race Day Bitch" aka: chauffeur, photographer, Sherpa, water boy and more!  I couldn't turn that down.  Amy was going to take care of both Marline and I that day, Marline was doing her first race ever, the 5K event and I was doing the 1/2 marathon (did I mention that's 21.1K?). 

 Marline and I in our Army Run swat.  Black = 1/2 marathon, White = 5K

The morning started off cold, pretty darned cold!  I started the morning in a sweater but I gave it to Amy once I went to find my starting corral.  I didn't want to be burdened and I knew as soon as I got started I would be warm enough.  By the end of my race, it was a perfect day, sunny and 20c the conditions couldn't of been better!

 Injured Soldiers getting ready to start the 5K race

The 5K race started at 8am.  There was lots of ceremony to the event, the Governor General's Band was there to lead us through O'Canada, there were MC's, lots of press and more.  The start the race with the injured soldiers who get a head start.  That was one of the most emotional things I have ever witnessed!  You saw all kinds of injured soldiers some in chairs, some with one prosthetic leg, some with two.  There were wheelchairs, crutches, canes and more.  It was truly moving to see all these men and women whose life have been changed forever serving our country.  Marline used to serve in the military and she was doing the race with a friend of hers who was injured while in the service, she's in a back brace.  Amy and I both had tears rolling down our faces.  Then the 5K runners were off!

 5K Runners waiting to start

Not long after they took off, I had time for a quick visit to the porta-potty and I had to go find my corral.  I had initially pegged myself as finishing in 2hr 30min.  I knew after the summer I had that this wasn't a reality, I figured I would be more in the 3hr range.  The next thing I knew the Howlizter Cannon went off and it was time to get moving!  I turned my music on as I crossed the start line and off I went to conquer 21.1 K as best as I could!

 Getting a high-five from Marline at the 18K mark

The course took us past Parliament Hill, The Supreme Court, National Library & Archives Canada, National War Museum, across the river and into the province of Quebec for a jog through downtown Hull, back across the Alexandria Bridge, past the National Art Gallery, National Mint, 24 Sussex Drive (the PM's house) and up to Rideau Hall then back towards the Rideau Center, down once side of the Rideau Canal across it and back up the other side to the finish line.

My initial goal was to run as long as I could, I figured somewhere between 5-8K the do the rest of the distance at a run/walk (10 min/1 min).  I even surprised myself and RAN THE FIRST 14 KM!  Well over half of the distance!

 Mark who had already run the 1/2 Marathon talking me through the last 2K to the finish line

I knew a couple of other people who were running the 1/2 Marathon that day.  My buddy Mark from Taekwon-do passed me when I was at the 3K mark and he was at the 6K mark.  Carrie from work passed when I was at the 14K mark and she at the 16K mark.  It really was a bolster to see friends running too!  I had the best surprise when I hit the 19K mark and I was starting to run out of steam and my body was starting to protest.  Mark who had already ran the 1/2 marathon was waiting for me and asked me if I'd like him to run the last few KMs with me.  I certainly didn't turn down the offer.  Mark was amazing, he kept up this continuous pep-talk to keep my moving and my spirits up when I was nearing the end of my endurance.  Because of Mark I finished, and I finished strong!

 V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!!!!

I couldn't believe it as the finish line came into sight and I saw 2:55:10 on the clock!  I was going to cross the line in UNDER 3 hours!  2:49:42.6 was my official time when you take into account the time difference between the gun going off and when I actually crossed the start line.

 Receiving my medal from a Canadian Soldier

Nice touch!  Dog tags for medals!

Looking amazingly fresh and happy after finishing my FIRST Half Marathon

This was one of the most amazing, empowering, and positive moments in my life!  Right now I feel like I could do anything!  I'd like to think that one of my strengths is how when I put my mind to accomplishing something I WILL accomplish it no matter how hard the challenge is.

 Cooling down afterwards and using my cool silver blankie as a super-hero cape!  I felt like a super-hero!

I went from this fat, unhealthy 200+ pound girl in 2007 who the only time you would of seen her running was out of a burning building, to running a 1/2 Marathon 21.1 K!!!

You can do truly amazing things when you're stubborn!

Is Today My Turn Around Day?

Weigh in on Friday morning, was not good.  I wasn't expecting to be up two pounds.  I am currently 7lbs over my goal weight.  Something, honestly I'm quite ashamed of.  I'm just letting my success slip away it seems lately.  Its like a car wreck, I've been watching it, doing nothing to help.  Of course I let the scale dictate the tone of my day, I was not a happy camper.  Whose fault is this?  My own, yes I have to take ownership of that.

Not only was the scale a huge warning sign to me yesterday, but my friend Amy came and talked to me.  She read that I needed to set a goal, and like good friends do she threw down the gauntlet for sure.  We have agreed to register for the Army Run in September for the 1/2 Marathon.  Are we going to run it, we don't know but they do allow walkers in this 1/2 marathon.  So now I do have this huge challenge looming after the summer is over.  Amy also told me about the 100 day challenge she's given to herself.  To track and to track HONESTLY for the next 100 days.  Well Amy, I hope you don't mind me stealing this idea!

Let me show you last week's tracking, and I've written on it exactly what it is...

Lies you ask?  Except for the total lack of activity points I was well within my daily points right?  WRONG.  I was tracking creatively, tracking what I felt like tracking, even randomly assigning low points values for food that I knew were higher.  All in attempt, I suppose to make myself look good "on paper" to see those average numbers and think "hey I'm doing not bad".  Do you know how many times I delved into the various candy dishes at work and did track a single chocolate or treat?  Several times a day!

So yesterday was day one for me, I tracked EVERYTHING honestly!  I also stayed away from the candy dishes (yay me!).  For some reason yesterday I wasn't very hungry and had a HUGE point surplus (like 12) at the end of the day.  So in the end I did go and enjoy a SMALL DQ dipped cone after dinner with my friend Christin.  Really who could eat 12pts of healthy food and not be ready to explode.  Really I didn't eat enough points through the day (breakfast/lunch).

Today, day two is going well so far, and there's really only dinner left to the day and maybe a snack between dinner and bedtime.  What has made today my turn around day?  I woke up and decided it was time to face the music.  I went to my Weight Watchers meeting, weighed in and paid up (since I was more than 2lbs over my goal weight).  I stayed for the meeting and took notes for a blog entry (will be separate from this one).  After getting home I went out for an 8K run.  It was too nice of a day to not, and I need to start getting in a longer run once a week.  I then decided it was time to clean my house.  I don't think I've done anything besides scrub the toilet bowl since leaving for Arizona back in March.

I truly believe that your home is a representation of your mental state.  Mine was getting kinda disgusting.  So I've got a clean home to reflect a more streamlined mental state.  I've exercised the last two days, and I'm back on the road to going to Weight Watchers meetings weekly.

So from now on, there's only one way to go, up... I mean down.

I THINK I've Figured It Out

For some time now I've been down.  I wouldn't say unhappy but no-so-happy.  Hard to be excited about anything, hard to be my smiley bouncy self.  I've been wanting to stick close to home, I've been tired.

Last night I was asked by someone I've known in the Taekwon-Do community since almost day one who I don't see very often how I was doing.  He could tell in my voice that things were just okay.  Not "great" as I would often say, because yes I'm usually great.  When we had an opportunity to talk he asked me what my goals were.

At this moment it clicked.  What are my goals?  I like to think I'm a goal driven person.  I like to have things to strive for and things to look forward to.  At times in my life its been Taekwon-Do promotions, tournaments, weight loss, and well there's my stitching too.  I find something and I become determined like hell to do it!

I think right now I'm lost in the woods with no compass, a runner with no finish line.

I do have Ottawa Race Weekend coming up in about a month now.  For this, the biggest challenge for me was actually registering.  I've run 10K in the past (on my own), I know I can still run to 10K.  From the moment I registered I have stated this is just a goal to complete, even if I have to do some walk/runs I will go and finish this race.  At this point I'm still not excited or nervous about race day.

I was asked about my 4th Degree Black Belt as a goal.  At the moment that's more of a long term goal, and I have to get out of this funk and just go and TRAIN for this to happen.  Well that and I need to go to an International Instructor's Seminar before I can qualify to test.  The rule of thumb is one year per current belt level before you can test.  This November will be my 2nd year as a 3rd Dan so I technically can't test until at least November of 2012.  Of late I've not felt as driven or pushed to go and do better, be a better martial artist.  Again this could be all a part of this whatever feeling I've got.  Getting my 4th Dan would be a lovely feather in my cap, the first female 4th Dan at our school.  Yup I should get on that.

I've not been to a Weight Watchers meeting since early April, when I last weighed in.  At first it was because I was away, but really that was only one weekend this past month.  The other meetings have been missed because, I didn't want to go/get out of bed on a Saturday morning.  This Saturday its time to go and face the music, get weighed in (the weight hasn't really budged but its not gotten worse), pay for being more than 2lbs over my goal weight, and get back into the habit of weekly meetings.  I haven't wanted the support that my Weight Watchers meetings have offered in the past, I probably need this the most right now and I've kinda turned my back on it.  No one can be successful on their own.

So all of this has led to some very poor eating on my part.  Giving into my cravings, poor food choices, eating when not hungry, eating just because, and not exercising (my week ends at midnight and as of right now I have 7 activity points for the week... normally I get 25-35/week). 

Its almost sad that I've gone from this focused, driven person to what I used to be, a lump sitting in my chair at home stitching or taking a nap.  I don't want to be that person anymore or ever again.  I want to find my drive and vigour for life... I need something to strive for, and I don't want it to be just maintaining my weight (yes I want to do that), because that has been my life focus for over 3 years now and there's more to life that that.

Flashback

Last week I was away visiting my good friend Kathy in SW Arizona, I had gone for the first time back in 2007 before I started my weight loss journey.  I went back this year, 3 years later.  I wanted to share these two pictures with you.

March 2007, almost exactly 3 years ago before starting my weight loss journey, and I thought I looked good then????  Oh my gawd!

March 2011 at the same entry point to Mexico 3 years later -- I LOOK AWESOME!

I am getting my feet back under me after so much travelling (4 countries, 4 weeks ... Canada, Dominican Republic, U.S. and Mexico)!  I did come back from Arizona 2.5 lbs heavier, due to too many extra treats, and at least one meal out every day... I find American restaurant food is not so waist friendly.  On the up side I did get to run outside twice during the week.

Goodbye 2010!

I'd like to say a fond farewell to 2010, as I look back to it, it wasn't as "spectacular" year in terms of my weight loss or my physical self. It was more like a "holding pattern" year, waiting to land... somewhere. I hit some amazing milestones in 2009 and I just don't think 2010 was able to live up to it. However I've been thinking and plotting to set myself up some goals/milestones for 2011.


I still have high hopes for the new Weight Watchers Points Plus Plan and will continue to follow it in 2011. Under this plan I have managed to loose 2 lbs between the week before and after Christmas! Now, not to sabotage myself and throw that loss away this week. Today was a bit of a bust as I ate about 15 points in chocolate. I'm down today, and its most likely because its back to work and the grindstone tomorrow! How have I been feeding that feeling? But with chocolate which is in abundance right now (don't have the heart to get rid of it right now cause its the really good stuff) I've attempted to use it to feel better. Even some retail therapy today (had to replace my laptop computer) I didn't feel any better. Actually I've looked at setting up this laptop as more of a chore, and it wasn't a planned purchase the keyboard on my old one bit the dust. We have bought a wireless keyboard for it, and Todd will use it to replace the dinosaur he's been using, he also doesn't need the portability a laptop gives that I do.

Oh yeah, back to the Weight Watchers thing... I'm hoping to loose my last pounds to hit my WW goal weight of 137 lbs this year!

I will start to focus on my training and 3rd Degree patterns at Taekwon-Do. Since my friends Jason and Peter have achieved their 4th Degree its kinda lit a fire under my tiny behind to get a move on. In an ideal world I shouldn't test until 2012, but I've been putting a bug in my instructor's ear that I'd like to try for late 2011. In the end it'll be his decision to evaluate how ready I am. I will continue to teach my Little Tigers and really enjoy it (4-6 year olds). I'm also hoping to compete again a few times this year in local tournaments.

I plan to pursue my running a little more this year. I'm already very bored of my treadmill and anxiously awaiting spring thaws (which won't happen until March!) to get out running on the road again. I am not one of those crazy people you see out trying to run through the snowbanks! I am already registered for the 10K on Ottawa Race Weekend May 28th, my first official timed race! I hope family and friends will be at the finish line! I'm planning to use this race as a jumping off point to participate in the Ottawa Arm Run's Half Marathon in September, which then will lead me to a full Marathon for Race Weekend 2012. At least that's the little thought running through my pea brain. Of course I'm registered for Run For The Cure again on the First Sunday in October, this past year I raised $1,410 for breast cancer research.

Personal Highlights of 2010.... (copied from my Stitching blog)

Little girl in the slum Simon Bollivar in the capital Santo Domingo

My Dominican Experience Trip for sure! What an amazing experience (see my posts from March 2010), and to share it with teenagers just made it so much more rewarding. I'm very fortunate and my Principal has allowed me to run the trip again for 2011 and in a few short weeks I'll be back in The Dominican Republic again, this time with 12 different students! I'm looking forward to my trip February 18-25th, and of course I will have photos for you!

My summer vacation was just so wonderful this year! I got to spend a couple of days up in the gorgeous Georgian Bay area with my friend Sheila, it was a treat for sure!

Then I got to spend 3 days in Quebec City with my Mum. If you're ever in Canada or are a Canadian everyone should make a trip to Quebec City once in their lives! I definitely want to go back and explore it some more.

Of course there have been the wonderful stitching retreats and get togethers I've been lucky to attend this last year! I enjoy and cherish each an every one of them. There's nothing more pleasing than being in a room full of people intent on one purpose that's to stitch!!! I of course am looking forward to more of these great days with friends in 2011!!!

Billy Talent

Nickleback

Concerts! There's not been too many of them in 2010 here in Ottawa but I did get to go to two great shows with Christin early on in the year, Billy Talent and Nickleback! Two of my favourite bands!

I got to see a once in a lifetime show this fall with my Mum when Roger Waters went on tour with Pink Floyd's The Wall from start to finish. Wow! What a show!

There was a hurricane named after me this year! However I do think it was a fairly well behaved hurricane... as well as a hurricane can be.

I was very proud this year to remember to and fully participate in NaBloPoMo! I posted once a day on TWO blogs for the whole month of November. Imagine doing 60 blog entries in 30 days? Yup I'm that crazy!

Finally on the fun side of life, I got to drive a Corvette for the first time ever!

I hope everyone has a fantastic New Year!



Teaching

Can an overweight teacher/instructor really be a true role model?
The last time I competed in 2006 1 year before starting WW

I do feel there's nothing more important in this world than being a teacher.  Teachers open doors for us, show us new worlds, and motivate us to be more, do better.

I am a teacher.  Well, not a school teacher, but I teach Taekwon-Do.  Early on, when I first started learning I had the BEST Taekwon-Do instructors ever!  I was taught by a world champion, I was taught by female who is technically amazing, and I was taught by the best motivator ever.  These three people I think are the ones who showed me the love and passion they have for Taekwon-Do and made me the martial artist and laid the foundation for the teacher/instructor I am today.  These people kept me motivated to keep training though I wasn't a small girl.

I don't think I was the best example of the ideal instructor when I was teaching at almost 200 lbs.  I knew the techniques, I knew how to do them to my best ability, I sure knew my theory.  How can someone so big be a true example?  A true motivator?  It took a bad foot injury, which happened while teaching my 7-13 year old students to make me stop.  I do think that this injury was the best thing that ever happened to me.  During this time I finally faced my weight problem, joined weight watchers, and as my foot got better (it was a long recovery ... probably due to my excessive weight) became an athlete, yes I consider myself an athlete.    Finally a year and a half later, I returned to Taekwon-Do.  Slowly I started training all over again, eventually working up to testing for my 3rd Degree Black Belt (almost a year ago now).



At my 3rd Degree Black Belt test, I can now move faster,
kick harder, jump higher, and more.  A better role model for
my young students.



This fall I took back up the role of instructor.  I only teach once a week, and I work with our "Little Tigers" program, specifically designed for 4-6 year old children. I absolutely LOVE working with these kids and opening their eyes to what they can achieve physically.  I try my best to motivate my students, to make them feel good about themselves and be proud of themselves for trying their best.

I now truly feel I am a proper role model of a healthy, active person.  I feel no shame when I stand in front of a class now asking them to go faster, kick harder, jump higher because now I can too.

Loosing my weight was the best thing I could ever do to improve myself as a martial artist.

Is That Really Me?

Today, I saw a picture of myself (it was taken today), and I did a double take, is that really me?  Am I really that small?  Loosing 63 lbs is a big deal, a very big deal.  Even now, after being at my goal weight (ish) for over a year I still have this picture in my head of the old me.  I think it takes a long time to adjust to the new image you have.  I was used to seeing this fat girl staring back at me in the mirror and that image has been in my head for so long its hard to see the "real" me.  The me who weighs 135lbs, the me who can run for 70 minutes non-stop, the me who isn't out of breath anymore, the me who fits into a size 8 pants went from a size 6 TKD uniform to a size 3 (and there's lots of room).  Its a big change!!!

Almonte Taekwon-Do Students at the tournament

Today was the Capital Cup Friendship tournament, I attended today both as a judge and as a competitor, something I haven't done since 2007.  When I last competed in a tournament I was over 200 lbs and a very bad case of plantar fascitis!  Today I was a different person!

All the black belt team pattern competitors

I completed in two divisions, Team Patterns with Paige and Jason and individual patterns.  Now this team we essentially put together Saturday afternoon, Paige and I figured out which pattern we'd do, where the breaks were, and positioning.  We then called Jason up and pretty much told him we were doing a team pattern (at Mr. Marin's request ... school owner) at Sunday's tournament.  We met up early, before the start of the tournament, practiced a few times, but then we were all sent to judge at assorted rings.  The end results from today?  Almonte Taekwon-Do did very well!  I am very proud of all the students and all the students I teach on a regular basis, its a good measure of how I'm doing as an instructor when my students attend tournaments, conduct themselves with honour, and do their best in the ring.

Me & Paige with our medals -- Jason had left by the time I was free to take a picture

In team patterns, we just killed it!  Paige, Jason and I won the gold medal!!!  However in individual patterns I didn't do so well, I made a mistake and ended up with a bronze medal.